As a child i liked color, shapes, light and different materials such as textile, paper, wood, minerals , sand and stones. Always i needed to analyze things ; touch it, feel it, smell and study it. Full of admiration i watched my uncle working at his studio waiting of the moment when i was allowed to work with a paint and canvas, i enjoyed the color of the oil paint, the smell, the brush, the canvas. When could i start painting……? i begin to copy with a pencil, made parts black and left parts white so i discovered contrast, i plaid with light and light fall.
At last i got color pencils and start practice flowers, trees, figures, persons and landscapes.
Anytime i discovered something new and try to draw from any other angel, any other corner, other light fall. My family noticed my creations but my wish to study at the academy encounter opposition. At last i choose for geology, fascinated as i was by minerals and fossils. i found lots of them when i was at my grandmother who lived in the mountain in Kurdistan. I was curious of the origin, of the source and may be i still could go to the moon….., were i could look for stones and minerals to analyze them, because my second wish was to become an astronaut. My third choice are geology evenly brought me near to my passion – studying stones; their structure, form, reflection of the light, there arise, origin of the cosmos, the earth. the ensemble of the elements fire, water, earth and air enlarged the respect, the wondering, the love which i feel for the earth brought me to art. It gave me a lot of energy and on the same time it empty me, i feel clear. it fill’s me with joy and happiness also with sadness, i feel one with it all. The earth as mother- symbol is for me no abstraction – just the opposite its the truth for me – as a little girl i have lost by illness my mother and trough the earth i feel the contact with her. You know her body was given to the earth and became earth, this element made me survive. It hurts me when i see the indifference, the exhaustions of the earth, the attack of the environment the milieu touch me more than i can say and hurt me. The honor and the respect of the nature by a lot of people makes me very happy. When i start a new work every time its an adventure excitement, several emotions, remember, a desire, waiting full looking for recognition and acceptance.
The first touch with the canvas start like a dance, has iteration and slowly roused, away from reality but on the end the result which again and again surprises me and though me. I never know what the end of my work will be. it is characteristic in my work that many times the same theme comes in the shape of a female figure or a deer, a picture of the pre-historic which are found on cave-walls. the deer is the symbol for love and safety. I remember a painting with deers hanging on the wall at my home, my mother was still alive, so it was for me a golden time, i felt save and protected and unconditional loved, curious for the feature.
When i paint a deer now it also gave me the feeling of love and peace in the wood. On the same time i am anxious to know of the artist who lived in the pre-hysteric time. My female figure is symbolic for power, beauty, vulnerability, motherhood, origin, earth, warmth, energy, rest and peace. At the beginning i start drawing figures and examples from nature, later on persons and landscapes and my interest in the big painters from the 18th and 19th century for example – cesanne, Manet, Monet, dali etc, i studied there style and tried it out on my own way. Especially impressionism calls my interest.
The last time i try to find balance in my work between rough and fine, hard and soft, light and dark. sometimes create concrete forms but most time abstract.
First i worked with dark colors, followed by a period of very light colors even transparent, now i incline to prime colors who overflow.
When i was twenty i experiment more with different natural material as sand, stone, minerals, wood, paper and textile. oil paint is now for me the most real medium because of the structure it gave me the possibility to express the contrasts. I can also express the tension between the materials. depending on the kind of work, i paint on any dimension. My preference is the dimension of the canvas so that i have room for energy movement with the material and canvas.